Death Research Paper
The loss of a loved one can drastically change a child’s life. A child who experiences this often loses their sense of belonging and control over their life. It is therefore important for teachers to do all they can to make that child feel worthy and important again.
Personally, I have been fortunate in that I have never experienced the loss of someone I care about. Death was not something that I gave much thought to as it has never touched my life. It was not until recently that a professor of mine said something that made me start to think about death. She said that in her twenty-five years of teaching, four of her students had died. She also stressed the importance of being prepared in case you have a student who loses a parent or a sibling.
During my half-day practicum, in a grade four-five class at Bayview Elementary, the class pet bunny died. Ms. Jorgensen, the teacher, held a ceremony to honour the bunny. Many of the students cried and so did Ms. Jorgensen. By not hiding her own feelings from her students she modeled grief for them which gave them validity for the sadness that they were all feeling. Being open encouraged her students to ask questions about death which Ms. Jorgensen openly and honestly answered. Drawing on more minor experiences with death, like this one, will better prepare the students for the occurrence of a more painful death as they will have a better understanding of what death is. I realized that I would not be prepared if death were to occur in my classroom. Therefore, I felt it was necessary to write a research paper about the inclusion of death and grief in the classroom.
Death is a difficult subject for anyone to talk about, and teachers are no exception. It is, however, a part of life and should therefore not be ignored. Although some people feel that that they are protecting children by avoiding discussions of death and grieving, or lying about what happened, they are not. What ends up happening is that the child will become confused or frightened.
“Teachers can help students cope with loss by being open and honest about death and encouraging discussions of feelings and ideas." (Westmoreland, 1996:159) The best way that teachers can help children to cope with the loss of a loved one is by being prepared. Being prepared involves understanding how children view death, knowing the basic concepts of death, being familiar with normal and abnormal expressions of grief, and having strategies for helping children to cope with death.
Children will inevitably encounter death whether it is with an insect, a class pet, or an elderly grandparent. According to extensive research, children start to form ideas about what death is at a relatively early age. (Essa & Murray, 1994:74) Knowing this and knowing that children will inevitably encounter death, it is important for teachers to develop an understanding of how children view death. A child’s understanding of death will be much more developed if that child has had a near-death experience or experienced the loss of a loved one. This holds true with almost anything; if a person has an experience with anything meaningful to them then they will understand it better than someone who has not experienced it.
Children in playschool or younger have a very limited perception of what death is. They rarely become preoccupied with it as they usually view death as temporary or connect it with sleeping. If they do connect death with sleeping, it is possible that the child could develop a fear of going to bed. It is also possible that a child at this age will blame someone for the death as they believe that death is something that is deliberately planned. (Westmoreland, 1996:158) An intense fear can follow anxiety if the child blames themselves for the death.
During the primary years, children have started to come to the realization that death is final. What they see on television may distort their view of death. It is also important to realize that at this stage a child may believe that death can occur to others, but not to themselves.
The intermediate years bring an understanding that death is an irreversible part of life and that it can happen to anyone including themselves. Paula Westmoreland points out that during these years a child may become preoccupied with the idea that their parents might die. (1996, p.158)
Using Piaget as a framework for understanding death with children has lead to some ambiguous results. Some believe that when children make the cognitive transition to concrete operations, this is crucial in understanding their concept of death. (Westmoreland, 1996:158) Although it is logical to assume that children who can reason better would have a more mature understanding of death, this is not always the case. It appears as though a child’s experience is more closely linked to their concept of death rather than to their cognitive level of development. Cognitive levels are important and should be used in understanding death, but if it is to be accurate it must incorporate experience. (Speece & Brent, 1984:55)
There are four basic components or concepts of death: finality, inevitability, cessation of bodily functions and causality.
1. Finality. Children need to be told that death is permanent and not reversible. They must understand that no amount of medicine or wishing can bring back what is dead. If a child is told that the deceased has gone on a trip, they might hold onto the belief that that person will return. When the person does not return this can cause a lot a pain and anger inside the child.
2. Inevitability. Children must learn to realize that death is something that occurs to every living thing. It is inescapable and a natural part of the life cycle. It should be emphasized that death is not a punishment.
3. Cessation of bodily functions. Recognizing that death ends all movement, feeling, thinking, and other abilities is important. Children who do not grasp this concept might develop an anxiety over the deceased person’s physical well-being. For example, if they were to witness a burial they might worry that the person will not be able eat or that they might get cold or scared. Not understanding this component might also lead to the belief that the person is just sleeping.
4. Causality. Understanding this component means understanding why death happens. It is important to teach children that people die from illnesses, injuries, and old age and not because someone was thinking bad things about the person or wishing them to die.
Many studies show that the acceptance of finality and inevitability occur first, usually during the early primary years. (Speece & Brent, 1984:55) Cessation of bodily functions also occurs during these years but comes about much more gradually than the first two. The understanding of causality occurs at a later age. It takes longer to develop as it requires the knowledge of biology and abstract thinking. (Essa & Murray, 1994:76) Young children might associate death with external factors such as violence, but will not comprehend internal factors like disease.
In dealing with grief there are four general stages that apply to both children and adults. The stages are fluid meaning that one can move in and out of the stages during the process of grieving. It is also possible to experience more than one stage at a time. The elderly often encounter this as they are more likely to experience numerous deaths during short time spans. Shock and disbelief is the first stage and children may appear calm or apathetic. The second stage, denial, usually occurs during the first couple of weeks after the death has occurred. It can last from a few minutes to many months. A child is in denial if they are refusing to admit to any loss or pretend that nothing happened. During the growing awareness stage, stage three, children can go through many kinds of intense feelings. They might experience uncontrollable anger towards the person who died for leaving them, towards others who could not prevent the death, or towards themselves for not being able to have stopped it from happening. This stage can also bring overwhelming feelings of pain and/or anxiety that can sometimes lead to depression. The final stage of grievance is acceptance which generally occurs two years after the death. I do stress the word generally as it can be much less for some and last a lifetime for others. Acceptance involves coming to terms with the death and moving forward with life.
Although the stages may be the same for both adults and children it is important to understand that children grieve differently than adults as their life experiences and developmental stages affect their view on death and their ability to cope with it. (Westmoreland, 1996:158) Children do not generally grieve regularly or constantly and therefore may sometimes seem to be handling the death well. Typical reactions include seeking attention or being hesitant to leave their parents and go to school. A teacher should watch for shorter attention spans, incomplete work, and more absences due to illness (headaches, upset stomachs). In Paula Westmoreland’s article, she points out some abnormal behaviours to watch out for. If these behaviours are noticed by the teacher, they should be reported to a professional counselor. The behaviours are: pretending that nothing happened, constant anger toward anyone and everyone, pervasive depression and isolation from family and friends, physical assault on others, excessive misbehavior, involvement with drugs or alcohol, panic or anxiety attacks, threats of suicide, and persistent physical illness. (1996:159)
“Several writers stress that children can be prepared cognitively and emotionally before they encounter death, that adults can immunize them with a `light dose’ of mourning." (Smilansky, 1987:24) This, of course, will not lessen the pain if death does occur, but it can help children to deal better with their loss. Large and small losses, such as parents divorcing or losing a favorite toy, are everyday experiences that teachers can use to talk about what it means to lose something valuable. If a class pet was to die, like in Ms. Jorgensen’s class, seeing the body and performing a burial can help to build the concept of cessation of bodily functions. Also, if you then make yourself open and available to your students they might raise questions surrounding the topic of death.
If a student in your class experiences the death of someone very close to them, like a sibling or a parent, it is important to be available to them and to encourage (not force) open communication in case they need to talk. Let them know that it is O.K. to express their feelings and that it is alright to be angry or sad. Choose your words very carefully, especially if the child is a primary student, because you do not want to give them false beliefs. Try to use concrete terms when talking to them as children are very literal in their interpretations. (Brodkin & Coleman 1994:24) Being understanding of the student's feelings, which may be constantly changing, is also necessary. Children also sometimes like to constantly talk about the deceased, this is normal and alright.
Classroom activities that can be helpful are journals, to record memories or thoughts, and art work, to paint the deceased or fond memories with the deceased. Trying to give the student a sense of belonging in the classroom will give them more control over their situation. This can be achieved by putting the child in charge of the classroom pet or putting them in charge of attendance.
Books can be a useful tool for helping children to cope with death. “Appropriate books should use direct and concrete words; involve the main character in death-related rituals; show respect for the feelings and understand the grief of the characters and end on a hopeful note, with life going on for the surviving characters.” (Essa & Murray, 1994:79) (Along with the works cited is a list of suggestions for appropriate books dealing with death -- (Essa & Murray, 1994:81))
Teachers’ behavior and actions can do a lot to help students in coping with their feelings of grievance. Whether the loss is of a particular student’s parent or of the loss of a student in the classroom, teachers can prepare themselves, and their students to some extent, to help them move through the grieving process. By demonstrating care and concern, encouraging open communication, and maintaining an awareness of the situation, teachers can facilitate a healthy grieving process.
Personally, I have been fortunate in that I have never experienced the loss of someone I care about. Death was not something that I gave much thought to as it has never touched my life. It was not until recently that a professor of mine said something that made me start to think about death. She said that in her twenty-five years of teaching, four of her students had died. She also stressed the importance of being prepared in case you have a student who loses a parent or a sibling.
During my half-day practicum, in a grade four-five class at Bayview Elementary, the class pet bunny died. Ms. Jorgensen, the teacher, held a ceremony to honour the bunny. Many of the students cried and so did Ms. Jorgensen. By not hiding her own feelings from her students she modeled grief for them which gave them validity for the sadness that they were all feeling. Being open encouraged her students to ask questions about death which Ms. Jorgensen openly and honestly answered. Drawing on more minor experiences with death, like this one, will better prepare the students for the occurrence of a more painful death as they will have a better understanding of what death is. I realized that I would not be prepared if death were to occur in my classroom. Therefore, I felt it was necessary to write a research paper about the inclusion of death and grief in the classroom.
Death is a difficult subject for anyone to talk about, and teachers are no exception. It is, however, a part of life and should therefore not be ignored. Although some people feel that that they are protecting children by avoiding discussions of death and grieving, or lying about what happened, they are not. What ends up happening is that the child will become confused or frightened.
“Teachers can help students cope with loss by being open and honest about death and encouraging discussions of feelings and ideas." (Westmoreland, 1996:159) The best way that teachers can help children to cope with the loss of a loved one is by being prepared. Being prepared involves understanding how children view death, knowing the basic concepts of death, being familiar with normal and abnormal expressions of grief, and having strategies for helping children to cope with death.
We can write a custom research paper on Death for you!
Children will inevitably encounter death whether it is with an insect, a class pet, or an elderly grandparent. According to extensive research, children start to form ideas about what death is at a relatively early age. (Essa & Murray, 1994:74) Knowing this and knowing that children will inevitably encounter death, it is important for teachers to develop an understanding of how children view death. A child’s understanding of death will be much more developed if that child has had a near-death experience or experienced the loss of a loved one. This holds true with almost anything; if a person has an experience with anything meaningful to them then they will understand it better than someone who has not experienced it.
Children in playschool or younger have a very limited perception of what death is. They rarely become preoccupied with it as they usually view death as temporary or connect it with sleeping. If they do connect death with sleeping, it is possible that the child could develop a fear of going to bed. It is also possible that a child at this age will blame someone for the death as they believe that death is something that is deliberately planned. (Westmoreland, 1996:158) An intense fear can follow anxiety if the child blames themselves for the death.
During the primary years, children have started to come to the realization that death is final. What they see on television may distort their view of death. It is also important to realize that at this stage a child may believe that death can occur to others, but not to themselves.
The intermediate years bring an understanding that death is an irreversible part of life and that it can happen to anyone including themselves. Paula Westmoreland points out that during these years a child may become preoccupied with the idea that their parents might die. (1996, p.158)
Using Piaget as a framework for understanding death with children has lead to some ambiguous results. Some believe that when children make the cognitive transition to concrete operations, this is crucial in understanding their concept of death. (Westmoreland, 1996:158) Although it is logical to assume that children who can reason better would have a more mature understanding of death, this is not always the case. It appears as though a child’s experience is more closely linked to their concept of death rather than to their cognitive level of development. Cognitive levels are important and should be used in understanding death, but if it is to be accurate it must incorporate experience. (Speece & Brent, 1984:55)
There are four basic components or concepts of death: finality, inevitability, cessation of bodily functions and causality.
1. Finality. Children need to be told that death is permanent and not reversible. They must understand that no amount of medicine or wishing can bring back what is dead. If a child is told that the deceased has gone on a trip, they might hold onto the belief that that person will return. When the person does not return this can cause a lot a pain and anger inside the child.
2. Inevitability. Children must learn to realize that death is something that occurs to every living thing. It is inescapable and a natural part of the life cycle. It should be emphasized that death is not a punishment.
3. Cessation of bodily functions. Recognizing that death ends all movement, feeling, thinking, and other abilities is important. Children who do not grasp this concept might develop an anxiety over the deceased person’s physical well-being. For example, if they were to witness a burial they might worry that the person will not be able eat or that they might get cold or scared. Not understanding this component might also lead to the belief that the person is just sleeping.
4. Causality. Understanding this component means understanding why death happens. It is important to teach children that people die from illnesses, injuries, and old age and not because someone was thinking bad things about the person or wishing them to die.
Many studies show that the acceptance of finality and inevitability occur first, usually during the early primary years. (Speece & Brent, 1984:55) Cessation of bodily functions also occurs during these years but comes about much more gradually than the first two. The understanding of causality occurs at a later age. It takes longer to develop as it requires the knowledge of biology and abstract thinking. (Essa & Murray, 1994:76) Young children might associate death with external factors such as violence, but will not comprehend internal factors like disease.
In dealing with grief there are four general stages that apply to both children and adults. The stages are fluid meaning that one can move in and out of the stages during the process of grieving. It is also possible to experience more than one stage at a time. The elderly often encounter this as they are more likely to experience numerous deaths during short time spans. Shock and disbelief is the first stage and children may appear calm or apathetic. The second stage, denial, usually occurs during the first couple of weeks after the death has occurred. It can last from a few minutes to many months. A child is in denial if they are refusing to admit to any loss or pretend that nothing happened. During the growing awareness stage, stage three, children can go through many kinds of intense feelings. They might experience uncontrollable anger towards the person who died for leaving them, towards others who could not prevent the death, or towards themselves for not being able to have stopped it from happening. This stage can also bring overwhelming feelings of pain and/or anxiety that can sometimes lead to depression. The final stage of grievance is acceptance which generally occurs two years after the death. I do stress the word generally as it can be much less for some and last a lifetime for others. Acceptance involves coming to terms with the death and moving forward with life.
Although the stages may be the same for both adults and children it is important to understand that children grieve differently than adults as their life experiences and developmental stages affect their view on death and their ability to cope with it. (Westmoreland, 1996:158) Children do not generally grieve regularly or constantly and therefore may sometimes seem to be handling the death well. Typical reactions include seeking attention or being hesitant to leave their parents and go to school. A teacher should watch for shorter attention spans, incomplete work, and more absences due to illness (headaches, upset stomachs). In Paula Westmoreland’s article, she points out some abnormal behaviours to watch out for. If these behaviours are noticed by the teacher, they should be reported to a professional counselor. The behaviours are: pretending that nothing happened, constant anger toward anyone and everyone, pervasive depression and isolation from family and friends, physical assault on others, excessive misbehavior, involvement with drugs or alcohol, panic or anxiety attacks, threats of suicide, and persistent physical illness. (1996:159)
“Several writers stress that children can be prepared cognitively and emotionally before they encounter death, that adults can immunize them with a `light dose’ of mourning." (Smilansky, 1987:24) This, of course, will not lessen the pain if death does occur, but it can help children to deal better with their loss. Large and small losses, such as parents divorcing or losing a favorite toy, are everyday experiences that teachers can use to talk about what it means to lose something valuable. If a class pet was to die, like in Ms. Jorgensen’s class, seeing the body and performing a burial can help to build the concept of cessation of bodily functions. Also, if you then make yourself open and available to your students they might raise questions surrounding the topic of death.
If a student in your class experiences the death of someone very close to them, like a sibling or a parent, it is important to be available to them and to encourage (not force) open communication in case they need to talk. Let them know that it is O.K. to express their feelings and that it is alright to be angry or sad. Choose your words very carefully, especially if the child is a primary student, because you do not want to give them false beliefs. Try to use concrete terms when talking to them as children are very literal in their interpretations. (Brodkin & Coleman 1994:24) Being understanding of the student's feelings, which may be constantly changing, is also necessary. Children also sometimes like to constantly talk about the deceased, this is normal and alright.
Classroom activities that can be helpful are journals, to record memories or thoughts, and art work, to paint the deceased or fond memories with the deceased. Trying to give the student a sense of belonging in the classroom will give them more control over their situation. This can be achieved by putting the child in charge of the classroom pet or putting them in charge of attendance.
Books can be a useful tool for helping children to cope with death. “Appropriate books should use direct and concrete words; involve the main character in death-related rituals; show respect for the feelings and understand the grief of the characters and end on a hopeful note, with life going on for the surviving characters.” (Essa & Murray, 1994:79) (Along with the works cited is a list of suggestions for appropriate books dealing with death -- (Essa & Murray, 1994:81))
Teachers’ behavior and actions can do a lot to help students in coping with their feelings of grievance. Whether the loss is of a particular student’s parent or of the loss of a student in the classroom, teachers can prepare themselves, and their students to some extent, to help them move through the grieving process. By demonstrating care and concern, encouraging open communication, and maintaining an awareness of the situation, teachers can facilitate a healthy grieving process.
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